Last Day of Class

Had lunch with Jill and Andrea, and then went back to school today for my last day of class, and we decided to go wacky since it is just 1 day before halloween! Lolz... So Jill and Bruce brought in a couple of wigs and when our teacher Laurence came in, she got a surprise! And she was game enough to put on her wig herself! So cool... but no pictures thou... Lolz... Thus ended my last day in school


Pic 1: Dr. Su, my anatomy teacher, and "adopted father" lolz. He's a medical doctor who graduated from the royal academy of medicine in Europe back in the 60s and got his PhD in neurology. He's like a walking medical encyclopedia.

Pic 2: Laurence Mourey, my meridians teacher from France. She was the one who was teaching the class today. Really cool person.

Pic 3: My Wacky classmates

Madam White Snake

Found a really really old drama series of the Legend of Madam White Snake! Lolz... This is the original one! Not the Fann Wong one, not the hong kong one... This is the one that I used to watch in my grandma's house when i was still in elementary school! How much time has passed since then... really nostalgic watching it again... Love those magic lights that they used to do when the characters are fighting and all... and the statues of gods that speak and what nots... Lolz... The good ole movies!

Here's the link if any of u are interested:

Madam White Snake

(Be warned, there's alot of cheesy singing that comes along with it too... yeah... the ole movies love singing alot...)

When I get to go to china, i'm sooooo gonna go visit the pagoda that the white snake was locked in hundreds of years ago!and the yin yang bridge! its all still there! Gotta find out which province its in... Lolz

The devil in me

Was supposed to receive my school refund since last friday, but till today, nothing happened and I found out that the director of finance didn't even receive my withdrawal form! Furious, I drove down immediately to school to meet the dean of student affairs and stood outside her office with my black akuma (demon) face...

Immediately, the director of admissions and the dean of student affairs halted their meeting and within 10 mins, I got my money. I did not even need to open my mouth. Sometimes, you just gotta unleash that demon in you before things get done.

Poems of me

Poems of me & Poems to me! Lolz... Thanks everyone...
Here are some of them:

Precepts

Had a really good chat with Aunt Guo Juan, and here are some words that really resonated with me...

"Precepts are precepts only when you have not embodied them. But when they are already part of you, then there is no more precepts, there is just you. It is like when you first became a vegetarian, there are many temptations. But there will come a time when all of that ceases and even if someone were to cook an extremely delicious dish of meat and place it in front of you, you will not be tempted to eat at all. For you understand the reasons behind your choice of being a vegetarian in the first place, and instead, you feel a great sense of compassion for the animal being killed. That is when being vegetarian has become a part of you. Then you know that you have passed that gate. It is the same with precepts. Always remember why did you took it in the first place. Was it for others? Or was it for yourself? You do not become enlightened overnight. Take it step by step..."

Happy Birthday Aunt Guo Juan!

After the farewell party yesterday, went over to Alameda to stay at Andrew's place. Drew and Tammy were both down from Ukiah. And at 12 midnite, we went to wish Aunt Guo Juan a Happy Birthday! Then we stayed up and chatted till about 2am before turning in.

Woke up at 8am today and everyone was already busy cooking in the kitchen. We helped out in mixing the food, and Tammy tried frying pancakes for auntie but it didn't turn out as well... but at least! There was the heart!

There were lots and lots of really good food, and Mrs. Bostick even baked a huge vegan cake! And it was decorated by Tammy and me! So the party kind of started since 8am and didn't end until 7pm! That's almost 12 hours! Lolz...

After everyone left, I stayed behind to help clean up and Aunt Guo Juan told me some really cool stories about her trip to Pu' Tuo Mountain and Wu Tai Mountain! Argh!!! I wanna go too! I think this trip back, I'm soooo gonna plan a trip there, hopefully sometime in the beginning of next year. Whether with others, or alone... I am so gonna try to make it happen. Else I wouldn't know when I'll get the chance to again.

Had a really good chat with Aunt Guo Hua as well, and she was trying to convince me to stay, saying that if I stay in USA, she will cook anything that I want! And bring me anywhere that I want! She even offered to buy my return ticket for staying permanently in USA! Lolz... That's a really big offer!

Oh well, after 2 continuous days of partying... Really exhausted. So i'm staying for another night before heading home the next morning. So gonna miss living at the Ha Family's House! So gonna miss all the good food! So gonna miss all the wonderful stories! And I'm so gonna miss this family of mine!

Farewell Party

Thanks to Jill for organizing the potluck party.
Thanks everyone for coming! Love u All! And I'll definitely miss u all!


Milly representing everyone in presenting the gift.


Reading the poems everyone wrote to me, and picture with my sister Jolyn and Weiliang


Pic 1:Party like a rock star! Yeah Baby! Lolz
Pic 2: Johnnie the big baby


The Wild Acupuncturists! Hmmz... so who'd like a treatment from one of us? Lolz

The bus...

Life is like a bus,
You're either waiting for the bus, or rushing after it,
The bus doesn't wait for you.
And when you finally get on,
A few stops later... It drops you off...
Its only a transition...
That's what life is....

I'm now waiting at the bus stop...
Waiting for my next journey to begin...
I wonder where will it lead me to...
Where will it drop me off...

Friday... the end of another week...
Time flies...
9 more days....

Chillin wf Chris

This morning, I woke up at 7am again. Despite being tired, I usually can't go back to sleep once i'm up. So i just wake up and gaze at the wall, wondering why is the world so unfair... coz other ppl can sleep so well... but i just can't do it...

And now with everything gone, I got ain't no nothing to do these days... just bumming ard and talking to the walls... Fortunately, Chris asked me out and my sister offered to pick me from my ivory tower... So had a good time at San Jose. Went to watch "Body of Lies" at the theaters. Pretty good show. Then had dinner at City restaurant - Same dish - Lemon grass tofu. Lolz... Finally got home close to midnight.

Fading off...

Have you ever thought, if today is the last day of your life, what would you do? I guess if it was me, I wouldn't be doing anything different... Today before I was gonna show my car, I was thinking, what if that guy's trying to rob me? Kidnap me? Or kill me? I actually thought of all the possible ways he could kill me... Lolz...

So I woke up this morning, showered, got dressed, did my morning prayers as if it was my last, had my "last" breakfast, and then i went to meet the guy... Fortunately, nothing bizarre happened. =P

My elementary school teacher once said that I'm the kind who feels that the world will end the next day, and I guess she was right in a way...

Finally sent my stuff to the shipping warehouse yesterday. 12 boxes of stuff in total. And I sold my car... sob sobz... the guy paid in cash! Never seen such a thick bundle of cash in my life before. Bought a UV device yesterday to check if the money was counterfeit. Quite cool. After the transaction, had to walk 1/2 of an hour to the bank to cash in the money... Not cool... Lolz... Too bad I can't keep it... its going to my sister's college fund... sighz...

Oh wellz... books gone, furniture gone, car gone... now all that's left is my luggage... and myself... I'm slowly slowly fading off....

Andrew!

Went with Aunt Guo Juan and Uncle Gou Hong up to cttb on sunday to meet my "baby" brother Andrew! Lolz... Once a baby, always a baby to me! Lolz... And together with Tammy, we went out to Cold Stones for ice cream and Taco Bell for Chalupas! It was fun hanging out... I'm so gonna miss you brother!

When we got back to cttb, we gave a good bye hug at the car, then aunt guo juan and I walked him to his dorm and gave a good bye hug there... then he walked us back to the car and it was another goodbye hug... Lolz... never ending.. lolz... but yeah... really gonna miss all the good times. Promise to be back. Definitely!

Also got to say bye to some of the other dorm students and a final bye to cttb for this year... i'll miss the place... and hope to come back soon. Went back to Alameda and I spent the night there before heading home to Pacifica on Monday.

Happy Birthday Jackson

Went to San Jose to celebrate Jackson's birthday. He has a really big family! 4 sisters and 3 brothers. 8 of them in total! And he's the youngest.. lolz... Poor kid, got bullied by all the older siblings after cutting the cake. Hahhaz

Felt really out of place at first coz everyone there was a family member and everyone was vietnamese... so i didn't really understand most of the conversation. Lolz... but they turned out to be really cool people. And they all thought I was Billy's classmate! They thought I was a high school junior... =.=... I'm actually older than all of them

After dinner, we all went out to play bowling. Haven't played for a long time, almost every other ball went in the gutter.. =P but everyone had fun. Then we went to Quickly for a drink before heading back.

Back home, one of the older brothers Binh was asking me about Buddhism because he doesn't believe in it and so went started talking about everything, about the philosophies, the teachings, about the gods, and of course, about ghosts.. and again... nobody dared to go back to sleep after... and so we all crammed in the living room. Lolz... I guess I can consider a career in story telling... Lolz....

But it was really nice hanging out with them. We talked from 10pm till 4am in the morning and Binh was saying that the last time he ever talked to anyone that long was a year ago when he first met his gf... lolz.... I guess i'm just really talkative..

They said its a real pity that we just got to know each other well, and then I am leaving... but i guess, at least the acquaintance has been made, and that in the future, i'll always know that there's another family for me in the states...=)

My companion

He has always been by my side,
Ever since i was 17.
I remember meeting him at a show in san jose back in 2002.
And when we first met, I knew that he was the one...
Together, we travelled cities after cities,
drove to rivers, mountains, lakes and oceans.
He even saved my life once, when I got into a really bad accident,
And throughout all these 8 years, he has never left my side...

And yesterday, my sister put him up for sale on the internet without me knowing... >.<
He is my car...

When I first bought him, I was congratulated by the dealership for being the 1st owner in USA to own that model as I got him straight out of the car show.

Now someone has responded and is offering a reasonable price...
I have no choice but to leave you...
I'll miss u... 5AUA514....

Step by Step

I have always wanted to be there for my family and friends,
to lend a shoulder to cry on when they're down,
to lend a listening ear for their troubles,
to just be there, and let them know that it's all gonna be alright,
But sometimes, I just don't know how...
And sometimes, I get lost in transition myself...

I'm like the mud bodhisattva entering a river,
in his attempt to save another, he gets washed away...

Over these past few days, I have been given many advice and words of wisdom... here are some that I feel are really true, and i shall hold to them to last my days through as I go back... (Don't remember the exact words, but this is the gist of it that i got)

For every two steps that you take forward, it is ok to fall one step back.
It is better to progress slowly in this way, than to race all the way to the top and ignore the foundation and then suddenly fall. That fall will be far worst.
You should take the time to see the world, only then in the later years, your heart will be at ease... for u would have seen it all by then, and its really not that different... (Dm Tsung)

There is no need to choose one or the other. Life is not just black or white. How much of it is yourself? And how much of it is from the expectations of society? You must always remember to stay true to your heart and conscience. Be sure that you are living life for yourself, and not because others want you to live it in a certain way. Do things that helps others, that gives back to the world, and I believe you will find happiness... (Rev. Heng Sure)

Cupertino

Met my sister Jolyn at cupertino today. Apparently, DeAnza released her transcripts late and UCSD denied her admissions... So she is in sort of the same status as her brother now... which is... no status...
Helped her to pack some of her stuff as well to send back home, and then she went to check out for schools around the area as I went about checking for car dealerships willing to buy my car.. Sob sobz...
Had dinner with her at Chipotle and we were commenting about why there are no Burrito stores in Singapore! Mayb i should start one... lolz... Finally headed back to pacifica after.

Goodbye speech

Went back to the City of Ten Thousand Buddhas for the Guan Yin Session on Saturday... And everytime I go there, it always fills my heart with happiness to see all the familiar faces light up and break into smiles the moment we meet. The hugs and warm welcome also makes me feel so much at home and makes going up to the city my greatest joy in living in the united states...

Met Rev. Heng Sure last night too, and when he heard the news, we arranged an immediate meeting today to talk things through.... I thank you for spending so much time with me, for the concern, and the guidance all these years... I know that it will be best for me if I stay in the states... but I somehow feel that I have to go back... to settle some things in my heart... before I'm ready to take the next step in life...

Had a good talk with Dharma Master Tsung earlier in the day as well. Thanks for understanding the situation and supporting my decision. I shall look forward to you coming to Singapore soon, and shall count on you coming to hunt me down if i ever run away from cultivation.

To all my precious brothers from the Boy's School, to Andrew, Billy, Jackson, Charlie, Tommy, Joe, Ali, Steve, Jim, Tim, Nevin, Jacky, Bill, Alex, Victor ... I'm so sorry to break such sad news to you guys... you guys have been the source of my happiness and it really breaks my heart to leave... but i somehow feel like i need to do it... I'm definitely gonna miss u all but for sure... whenever I can... I'll definitely visit! And make it feel as if I have never left...

Not to forget, my wonderful sister Julia! So sorry that this is such a last minute decision that we didn't even get to say bye in face... And my anime buddy Tammy! And of course... Felix... I won't forget you! Lolz..

And to Sunny and Weiyu... I'll most prob see you 2 in Singapore

Hope I didn't miss out on anyone... =P

Its really tempting to just give up the idea of going back to Singapore... but I think I shouldn't flicker too much with my decisions... my heart feels like it is something that I should do, thou it may not be in my best interests... And in DM Tsungs words, I should go out and see the world first... only then will I be satisfied in my later years... That is why i have decided..

Friends for Life

Article
Read this Article on the web today, about 4 different people and how their closest friend made a difference in their lives...
Friendship is a really wonderful thing...

After weighing the choices between SIngapore and USa, I've decided on SIngapore... And now I'm faced with another choice... 5 year full time or 7 years part time? With full time, i get zero income... with part time, i can work and study...

Choices, choices, choices... life's full of choices...
Depending on what you choose, your life steers differently...
Make one wrong choice... and 10 years down the road, you'll find yourself somewhere totally unfamiliar... this is the butterfly effect...

I think I'm going to leave for the mountains... 上山閉關修行...
Maybe my mind will clear up better after that...
I'll return to civilization next week...

2nd presidential debate

THe 2nd presidential debate spoof on Saturday Night Life! Lolz... You gotta watch the actual debate 1st to understand it better... Hecka funny! hahaz. You probably can find the actual debate on NBC.com.

The Wind

I sometimes feel... like I am the wind...
Coming and going... Transient in nature...
Never settling in one place... Constantly moving...

A friend said that I'm more like a hurricane.
Coz where ever I go, I'm busy like hell.
I leave my "devastating" effects...
And then I move on....

"Life is short,
Break the rules,
Forgive quickly,
Love truly,
Laugh uncontrollably,
And never regret anything that made you smile."

Marriage proposal

Back to class today, and everyone heard that I was leaving and was so sad... And this was Andrea's response: "Are you telling me to marry you so that you'll stay?" Lolz... Although I said no then... here's my other answer: hell yeah... If I can have you as my wife... I'd definitely stay! Lolz.. Who wouldn't? But I know you were just playin... Thanks for baking the muffins thou, they were really delicious! =)

And thanks to Jill, Amanda, Anita, Ervina, Michelle, Lisa and Laurence for all the advise and opinions that you all have shared... I'm sooooo gonna miss you all... I didn't realize it until I met all of you again today... And thank you Andrea!!! Its the 1st time in my life that such a beautiful girl ever proposed to me... even if it was just for fun... I think i'm satisfied with my life for now! Lolz

How can anyone in their right mind ever bear to leave all you beauties and go back to Singapore and study with aunties? What am I THINKING!!! Sigh... but then again, I kind of need the option to be able to practice in Singapore in addition to USA. No matter what... my family's still in Singapore... I'm sorry dears....

After procrastinating for 8 hours in school, going back and forth from the Admissions office, I finally submitted my withdrawal form... Sobz Sobz... Can you hear my heart breaking? I'm so sad... Sad sad Sad!!!

Back to school...

Went back to school today to meet the administrators.... Can you believe it... its a monday and none of them are at work.. Some take off, some take MC... Managed to meet the admissions lady for a while, but then she said she has a slight headache... and the next thing I know, she took half day off too... Headache take panadol what.. where got take half day off one... =.=...

So I got nothing much done... and worst of all, on top of that, got a parking ticket for nothing! GHeez... What a big welcome back... Got back home at 5pm, was so tired, so I decided to take a short nap. Ended sleeping till 10pm... So not gonna be able to sleep tonight again... Its gonna be tough getting over this jet lag...

Scary world

Sheltered by monastery walls, I grew up thinking all was easy
Stepping out into the world, I was blown around by the eight winds...

Prority. When you make a choice, you give up another...
Life's all about choices...
How do you know that the choice you make will be the right one?
Knowing only after it has been made is too late...

I guess I can understand why hermits chose to be hermits
But I also understand why some people choose to drown themselves in the world.

I had the choice... to step back into the monastery walls... but will that be considered as escapism? I dunno...

I choose to return to the world... to live in the maelstrom of existence...
Now... I must prepare,
For the storm that awaits beyond...
awaiting for my arrival...

（蘇摩嚧波）
愛人不親顧其仁
禮彼弗答敬未真
迴光反照求諸己
感應道交莫迷神

back to the states...

Home.. my 2nd home. After a long plane and train ride, I finally arrived on the silent hill that I lived on for the past year. Everything is just as I had left it. The silence welcomes me back. In a way, it is really assuring, as it is never changing and always there. Yet in another way, the silence can be deafening, amplifying the loneliness at times...

This trip back is gonna be short, so I didn't intend for any send offs... But to those who still came... Thx for coming! =)
And Thx John Lim for the photos. =P

Painted Skin

Went to watch the "Painted Skin" with Gerald Tay this afternoon. Thought it was gonna be a scary ghost show, turns out to be pretty hilarious. Hahz... quite alot of really lame parts. But I must say, actress Zhou Xun looks really HOT! especially at the part where she reveals her demon form and has her face all painted white... lolz... I think i have a thing for demons.. lolz.. otherwise, maybe I just like really white faces... That's why, all the more so I should marry a Japanese! And have a traditional Japanese Wedding! So my wife can paint her face white white! Lolz...

Anyway, went for Samuel Teo and Eliza's Gig at SMU after. Managed to make it in time for their singing of "The Man Who Can't be Moved." My favourite song of their pick when I was there during their rehearsal. Way to go both of u! Glad I managed to make it to your very 1st public gig! =)

Met Jeffrey later for late dinner at Pasta Mania, and the to the Selegie Tofu place again. Had delicious you tiaos and dou hua. Then hung around Serangoon garden till about 1am. My last night in singapore... well spent! =)

US Vice Presidential debate

I think the VP debates went pretty well. At least it was more interesting than the 1st Presidential debate.

Gov. Sarah Palin is a really interesting character. Her impersonator is more so. Vote TIna Fey for VP! Lolz...

Pins and needles...

Brought my sister to the temple to have vegetarian food today. Came back home after and was feeling bored.. so I decided to play with my new acupuncture set given by Marcus and ALvin. Stuck my 1st needle into myself today! Used the point ST 36. Stuck the entire 1.5 inch needle in. My sister was just observing in horror by the side. It was painless. Quite cool thou.. hehehez... (Ok.. I noe most of you must be thinking that I'm a masochist now.. Lolz)

Day ?

I've extended my stay so much that I've kind of lost count of the amt of days that I've been in Singapore. Met up with Gerald for a swim in the morning. Well, more like a soaking in water session.. Lolz... then went to Chinatown to meet his schoolmates for another round of Ktv. Then met up with Jeff n Mingyang for dinner. Then desserts at this famous dessert place, then coffee at starbucks... Eating, eating, and eating again... lolz... SOooo gonna hafta start planning an exercise program soon. Got home passed midnight once again. But, had a fun day. =)